My eyes close and my mind wanders. Slowly, I begin to forget where I am, but soon an announcement comes over the intercom or I turn ever so slightly and catch a whiff of industrial cleaner, then it all comes flooding back. The sounds of the hospital fill my ears. The cries and grunts of expecting mothers and the worrisome shifting of feet by the fathers. The yelling fights at the nurse's station over insurance, and the ragged breathing of the injured. The continuous crying of the people in the waiting room, but whether because they are happy or sad I have no idea. Luckily with my eyes closed I can still ignore the reason I'm here. Yet, I still smell the much to lemony industrial cleaner, the sour disinfectant, and the salty stench of blood. Tears fill my still closed eyes.
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I fight them down, try to think of something else, anything to avoid thinking about what I am doing in a hospital. Someone stumbles into my leg, but I refuse to open my eyes, and let them continue on their way. I know that if I open my eyes now, everything is lost, I will no longer be able to ignore the truth. I focus my mind on the past, on happier times, happier days. My thoughts immediately travel to the day I met Jessie.
I'd been working outside in the hot sun, building a shed for my father, when he walked up to me. He said he'd been walking down the street when he noticed a young girl doing work that was obviously meant for two. He reached over my shoulder and held up a board so I could nail it in. He offered his help, and I accepted. It quickly became clear that he wasn't really of any use as a carpenter, but he was pleasant to talk to, and even more pleasant to look at, especially when he took off his shirt. When I finally finished building the shed I invited Jessie in for a cold drink and a snack. He spoke just as easily to my father as he had to me, and when he finished his drink I invited him to help me paint the shed the next day. I was sixteen then.
"Dr. Matson, please report to OR 7, Dr. Matson, please report to OR 7." A woman's voice fizzles through the intercom. My eyes flash open, only for a second, but that's long enough. The fluorescent light burns my eyes, but the momentary blindness fades quickly, and the waiting room comes into sharp focus. I shut my eyes almost instantly, but the vision of the room is seared onto the back of my eyelids. I can see the nurse behind the counter shaking her head at the man argueing with her. I can see the bloddy bandaged arm of the man sitting next to me. I can see the little girl hugging her mother's legs and crying. I can see the forms in my hands, the ones I've been writing on...no I can't think of them. Think of anything else.
Jessie planned a completely insane eighteenth birthday for me. He said he wanted my initiation into adulthood to be unforgettable. I asked him if he actually wanted me to grow up considered that the celebration consisted of finger painting, play doh, roller skating, and watching lots of children's movies. Still, it was the most fun I'd had in a long time, the most fun I'd had since my mother died. When the night ended in a pillow fight and a not quite so innocent sleep over I knew it would be my best birthday ever. It was also the first time I told Jessie I loved him.
"Ms. Harrison, Melody?" says a voice above me. Reluctantly I open my eyes and look up at the nurse. She gives me a sad smile. "Have you finished the paperwork?" I glance down at the forms, only half finished, and shake my head.
"I'm sorry...it's just...I can't" I stutter to a stop. I'm not sure how to explain what I'm thinking to the nurse, but she simply smiles and lays her hand over mine.
"It's quite alright, there will be time for that later. Right now they are ready for you." She stands and I follow without really thinking about it or paying attention to where I'm going. She leads me down the hall to a small room. There is a doctor there and she offers me the same sad smile. I try not to look around, not to see the bed, but I can't help myself. Jessie lies there, his face barely recognizable, half his body covered in casts. Beeping and pulsing machines surround his body, tubes run into him from every side. When I can't bear the sight of it anymore I turn to the doctor.
"We've done everything we could, but I'm afraid the injuries were too severe. He likely won't make it another hour. I'm surprised he's managed to hang on this long. I'm so sorry." I hear the doctor's words, but I can't accept them, they can't be true.
"But, he's only nineteen, we're supposed to get married next week. We have an entire life to live." I say, feeling the tears start to flow down my cheeks. The nurse squeezes my hand, but I shake her off and go to Jessie. "You can't be dying, I won't allow it. You promised me vanilla cake and a honeymoon I would never forget. You can't leave me now."
I grab Jessie's hand and hold tight, but he doesn't squeeze back. I sit there, crying and begging him not to leave as the heart monitor begins to blip slower and slower. Then I lean down and kiss him until I hear nothing but the long steady beep that tells me my best friend is gone forever.
Showing posts with label Finish A Story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Finish A Story. Show all posts
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Thursday, May 31, 2012
May 31st
"Ok guys, what have you got for me?" I ask as the group gathers round.
"His name is Robert Emerson," Nikolas says. "No one, not even Miss Merton, knows where he came from. He showed up two days after Ms. Lloyd was fired."
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"According to the records Jess and I borrowed from the principals office he's from LA. His cover letter said he's been a teacher for almost ten years but was looking for a school where he could make an individual difference with students. He figured that a tiny high school in Iowa was a great place to get that kind of experience." Jay chimed in as he flipped through the papers in the brown folder in his lap. Jess was nestled into his side pointed out things in the file as he spoke.
"He just happens to pick a school that's full of kids who spend their nights training to be in the FBI and CIA? He just happens to end up at a school that never, ever, hires from the outside, except that they're in a bind right now? He just happens to arrive days after a valued teacher is fired for leaking private school information? He just happens to teach world history, the same subject as the fired teacher? And he just happens to be from a huge city, making verifying his identity a complicated task?" I could tell that Aly could and would go on for hours, so I held up a hand.
"Those are all good questions Aly, but I think the most important question is why are we the only ones asking these questions? We all know that all the teachers are, or at least were, FBI or CIA, so why do they not seem concerned?" I asked to no one in particular.
The group gathered around me looked at each other and started thinking. Jess and Jay whispered quietly to each other. Aly started writing furiously in the notebook that was never far from her fingers. Nikolas opened up his computer and started typing. Frank glanced at me and nodded towards Miss Merton's office. I glanced over to see her sitting at her desk grading papers. I nod back. Without saying a word we get up and walk to her office. Miss Merton looks up as we enter the classroom. I close the door behind me and Frank steps in front of it, guarding without a word.
"What's up Melody?" Miss Merton indicated the chair in front of her desk and I sat down.
"We're concerned about Mr. Emerson. You know how this school works, and it worries us that no one is questioning his acceptance as a teacher here."
"Why would that concern you? Mr. Emerson seems perfectly qualified as a World History teacher, and I'm sure that the Principal wouldn't have allowed anyone to work here without approval." Miss Merton returned to grading her papers and seemed to consider the conversation finished, but I wasn't done.
"That's what I want to believe, but that's not the evidence right in front of me. Ms. Lloyd was a good teacher, and a loyal agent from what I've read. I can't imagine her selling secrets of any kind, but it seems like no one questioned that either."
"Ms. Lloyd had us all fooled I'm afraid. In fact, if something she sold hadn't been leaked to NBC we might never have found out at all. The trail to connect her to the information was buried quite deep. She wouldn't even admit to it in the end, she was so committed." I stared at Miss Merton, didn't she hear the words she was saying? Didn't she feel, in her gut, that something was off?
It became obvious that I wasn't going to get anywhere with her, so I nodded to Frank and we went back and joined the rest of the group at the courtyard table. As soon as we sat down everyone leaned close. I watched Nikolas scout around the courtyard to make sure no one was looking or listening before he began speaking. He laid his tablet in the middle of the table and typed on his laptop as he spoke.
"I really think that Romans had the best ideas about conquering nations..." Nikolas blathered on about Roman history, but although we responded from time to time, none of us were really listening. Instead we were glued to the tablet screen, reading the words that scrolled there as Nikolas typed. It turned out that there was no record, in LA or anywhere else, of a teacher named Robert Emerson. The credentials on his resume were good fakes, but they were still fake. There was a dummy teacher set up everywhere he claimed, but with some digging Nikolas was able to discover that not a single actual person could back up the computer files. It was obvious that Emerson was a fake.
More than that, though, it appeared that he might have been behind the firing of Ms. Lloyd. It turned out he was in possession of much of the information she supposedly stole, and a barely there computer code showed that he would have been able to take that from her and leave a false trail. It also showed that he recently transferred money to Ms. Lloyd's account. Nikolas reminded us that it didn't mean she was innocent, because they could just be working together. By passing around the keyboard we exhausted all the information each of us had recovered. Eventually we had enough. I took the tablet and lead the way to the principal's office.
"As you can see, Mr. Granger, despite what anyone has lead you to believe, Mr. Emerson is not what he claims to be." I said after laying out all the information in front of the principal. I expected him to look shocked, or horrified, or, at the very least, embarrassed, but instead he just smiled.
"Congratulations Alpha Team, you've completed your first test. The CIA would be happy to welcome you all as recruits."
"His name is Robert Emerson," Nikolas says. "No one, not even Miss Merton, knows where he came from. He showed up two days after Ms. Lloyd was fired."
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"According to the records Jess and I borrowed from the principals office he's from LA. His cover letter said he's been a teacher for almost ten years but was looking for a school where he could make an individual difference with students. He figured that a tiny high school in Iowa was a great place to get that kind of experience." Jay chimed in as he flipped through the papers in the brown folder in his lap. Jess was nestled into his side pointed out things in the file as he spoke.
"He just happens to pick a school that's full of kids who spend their nights training to be in the FBI and CIA? He just happens to end up at a school that never, ever, hires from the outside, except that they're in a bind right now? He just happens to arrive days after a valued teacher is fired for leaking private school information? He just happens to teach world history, the same subject as the fired teacher? And he just happens to be from a huge city, making verifying his identity a complicated task?" I could tell that Aly could and would go on for hours, so I held up a hand.
"Those are all good questions Aly, but I think the most important question is why are we the only ones asking these questions? We all know that all the teachers are, or at least were, FBI or CIA, so why do they not seem concerned?" I asked to no one in particular.
The group gathered around me looked at each other and started thinking. Jess and Jay whispered quietly to each other. Aly started writing furiously in the notebook that was never far from her fingers. Nikolas opened up his computer and started typing. Frank glanced at me and nodded towards Miss Merton's office. I glanced over to see her sitting at her desk grading papers. I nod back. Without saying a word we get up and walk to her office. Miss Merton looks up as we enter the classroom. I close the door behind me and Frank steps in front of it, guarding without a word.
"What's up Melody?" Miss Merton indicated the chair in front of her desk and I sat down.
"We're concerned about Mr. Emerson. You know how this school works, and it worries us that no one is questioning his acceptance as a teacher here."
"Why would that concern you? Mr. Emerson seems perfectly qualified as a World History teacher, and I'm sure that the Principal wouldn't have allowed anyone to work here without approval." Miss Merton returned to grading her papers and seemed to consider the conversation finished, but I wasn't done.
"That's what I want to believe, but that's not the evidence right in front of me. Ms. Lloyd was a good teacher, and a loyal agent from what I've read. I can't imagine her selling secrets of any kind, but it seems like no one questioned that either."
"Ms. Lloyd had us all fooled I'm afraid. In fact, if something she sold hadn't been leaked to NBC we might never have found out at all. The trail to connect her to the information was buried quite deep. She wouldn't even admit to it in the end, she was so committed." I stared at Miss Merton, didn't she hear the words she was saying? Didn't she feel, in her gut, that something was off?
It became obvious that I wasn't going to get anywhere with her, so I nodded to Frank and we went back and joined the rest of the group at the courtyard table. As soon as we sat down everyone leaned close. I watched Nikolas scout around the courtyard to make sure no one was looking or listening before he began speaking. He laid his tablet in the middle of the table and typed on his laptop as he spoke.
"I really think that Romans had the best ideas about conquering nations..." Nikolas blathered on about Roman history, but although we responded from time to time, none of us were really listening. Instead we were glued to the tablet screen, reading the words that scrolled there as Nikolas typed. It turned out that there was no record, in LA or anywhere else, of a teacher named Robert Emerson. The credentials on his resume were good fakes, but they were still fake. There was a dummy teacher set up everywhere he claimed, but with some digging Nikolas was able to discover that not a single actual person could back up the computer files. It was obvious that Emerson was a fake.
More than that, though, it appeared that he might have been behind the firing of Ms. Lloyd. It turned out he was in possession of much of the information she supposedly stole, and a barely there computer code showed that he would have been able to take that from her and leave a false trail. It also showed that he recently transferred money to Ms. Lloyd's account. Nikolas reminded us that it didn't mean she was innocent, because they could just be working together. By passing around the keyboard we exhausted all the information each of us had recovered. Eventually we had enough. I took the tablet and lead the way to the principal's office.
"As you can see, Mr. Granger, despite what anyone has lead you to believe, Mr. Emerson is not what he claims to be." I said after laying out all the information in front of the principal. I expected him to look shocked, or horrified, or, at the very least, embarrassed, but instead he just smiled.
"Congratulations Alpha Team, you've completed your first test. The CIA would be happy to welcome you all as recruits."
Thursday, May 24, 2012
May 24th
"Why did you die? You weren't supposed to die."
The words rode the wind to meet my ears where I stood in the graveyard. I moved toward the voice silently. I stood behind a tree and quietly watched the figure kneeling by a grave. She was a pretty girl, no, not pretty, beautiful. She had long strawberry waves that fell gracefully down her back. Her skin was the palest cream. She was slender, but not skinny, and delicate.
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"You promised me you'd always be there, that you'd never leave me alone. They were the ones who left me, but you didn't. You stayed, you said you'd always stay. I don't know how to be alone, I don't know how to be without you."
The girl collapsed into sobs that shook her entire slender form. I inched closer, hoping to read the name on the gravestone, curious about who she was yelling at and crying to. Yet before I could see anything clearly, and despite my silent careful movement, she somehow sensed my presence. I watched her shoulders stiffen and briefly considered ducking behind one of the larger gravestones, hoping she would brush the feeling off, but she robbed him of that decision with a few soft spoken words.
"I'm sorry, I know I was being loud." She said, without turning or even straightening from where she'd collapsed in tears. All thoughts of running away fled from my mind and I instead found my feet carrying me closer. Without communicating with my brain my legs folded and I found myself kneeling next to the girl in front of the grave. She still hadn't turned to look at me, but now I could see the gravestone clearly. There were no dates on the stone, but the name and inscription we clearly visible.
Kasey Branson
Loving Brother
Taken After Only 25 Short Years
"You have nothing to be sorry for." I said quietly, but she jumped at the sound of my voice. She truly hadn't noticed that I'd knelt down next to her. For the first time she turned to face me and I was immediately struck by how beautiful she was. Despite the puffiness in her cheeks and the redness in her eyes, she was stunning. Her eyes were a pale amethyst that despite logic, seemed to be natural. If she wore any makeup I couldn't tell, but her skin was smooth and her lips were a pale pink. There was a spatter of freckles across her nose and cheeks, and I found myself lost in the patterns I found in them, until she spoke again.
"It's nice of you to say that..." I continued to stare until I realized she was waiting for something, it took me a moment more to realize that thing was my name.
"Cameron, and it's not nice of me, it's the truth. You should never apologize for being sad..." Now it was my turn to wait for a name.
"Cassie."
"Cassie." I savored the sound of her name, lengthening the syllables. Then I nodded my head at the gravestone. She turned back to face it and I saw tears once again shining in her eyes.
"My brother, Cassie and Kasey, my parents thought it was funny. They died when I was eight, Kasey was twelve. He raised me, kept me safe through all the foster homes and orphanages, until he turned 18 and could care for me on his own. He was my everything for so long, and I thought he'd always be there." I found myself reaching out to her, but I stopped short, we'd only just met.
"When did he die?"
"Three years ago, he was killed by a drunk driver while coming to get me from college for the start of summer break. I hadn't seen him in almost three months, I'd been to busy with my college friends and classes. When we talked on the phone that day we argued about what I was going to do that summer, I wanted a job out of town and Kasey wanted me to stay at home and work there. We hung up angry...and I never saw him again." This time I did place a gentle hand on her leg and to my surprise she turned and clutched my arm, resting her head on my shoulder. I sat still, shocked, and let her speak and cry.
"I managed to finish school, it was hard, but I knew he'd want me to. But school ended months ago, and I just don't know what to do with myself. I can't go back to the home we shared, I can't face the idea of cleaning up his things, I have no plans, no future without him."
She began sobbing in earnest and I turned so that I was cradling her to my chest, her tears soaking my t-shirt. It occurred to me that from the outside we would look strange, two twenty something strangers locked in an embrace in a deserted cemetery, but in that moment it felt right. When Cassie had finally cried herself out she turned her face up to look at me.
"Cameron, I'm so"
"No," I interrupted her immediately, "you need to stop being sorry." I stared into her eyes for a moment, choosing my next words carefully. "Do you need a ride somewhere? It doesn't have to be home, I'll take you anywhere you want to go."
She stared at me for a long time, trying to read something in my face, and then she nodded. Without asking permission my hand reached up and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Fast as lightening a thought flickered through my head, and without taking time to analyze I acted. I leaned down and kissed Cassie.
And she kissed me back.
The words rode the wind to meet my ears where I stood in the graveyard. I moved toward the voice silently. I stood behind a tree and quietly watched the figure kneeling by a grave. She was a pretty girl, no, not pretty, beautiful. She had long strawberry waves that fell gracefully down her back. Her skin was the palest cream. She was slender, but not skinny, and delicate.
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"You promised me you'd always be there, that you'd never leave me alone. They were the ones who left me, but you didn't. You stayed, you said you'd always stay. I don't know how to be alone, I don't know how to be without you."
The girl collapsed into sobs that shook her entire slender form. I inched closer, hoping to read the name on the gravestone, curious about who she was yelling at and crying to. Yet before I could see anything clearly, and despite my silent careful movement, she somehow sensed my presence. I watched her shoulders stiffen and briefly considered ducking behind one of the larger gravestones, hoping she would brush the feeling off, but she robbed him of that decision with a few soft spoken words.
"I'm sorry, I know I was being loud." She said, without turning or even straightening from where she'd collapsed in tears. All thoughts of running away fled from my mind and I instead found my feet carrying me closer. Without communicating with my brain my legs folded and I found myself kneeling next to the girl in front of the grave. She still hadn't turned to look at me, but now I could see the gravestone clearly. There were no dates on the stone, but the name and inscription we clearly visible.
Kasey Branson
Loving Brother
Taken After Only 25 Short Years
"You have nothing to be sorry for." I said quietly, but she jumped at the sound of my voice. She truly hadn't noticed that I'd knelt down next to her. For the first time she turned to face me and I was immediately struck by how beautiful she was. Despite the puffiness in her cheeks and the redness in her eyes, she was stunning. Her eyes were a pale amethyst that despite logic, seemed to be natural. If she wore any makeup I couldn't tell, but her skin was smooth and her lips were a pale pink. There was a spatter of freckles across her nose and cheeks, and I found myself lost in the patterns I found in them, until she spoke again.
"It's nice of you to say that..." I continued to stare until I realized she was waiting for something, it took me a moment more to realize that thing was my name.
"Cameron, and it's not nice of me, it's the truth. You should never apologize for being sad..." Now it was my turn to wait for a name.
"Cassie."
"Cassie." I savored the sound of her name, lengthening the syllables. Then I nodded my head at the gravestone. She turned back to face it and I saw tears once again shining in her eyes.
"My brother, Cassie and Kasey, my parents thought it was funny. They died when I was eight, Kasey was twelve. He raised me, kept me safe through all the foster homes and orphanages, until he turned 18 and could care for me on his own. He was my everything for so long, and I thought he'd always be there." I found myself reaching out to her, but I stopped short, we'd only just met.
"When did he die?"
"Three years ago, he was killed by a drunk driver while coming to get me from college for the start of summer break. I hadn't seen him in almost three months, I'd been to busy with my college friends and classes. When we talked on the phone that day we argued about what I was going to do that summer, I wanted a job out of town and Kasey wanted me to stay at home and work there. We hung up angry...and I never saw him again." This time I did place a gentle hand on her leg and to my surprise she turned and clutched my arm, resting her head on my shoulder. I sat still, shocked, and let her speak and cry.
"I managed to finish school, it was hard, but I knew he'd want me to. But school ended months ago, and I just don't know what to do with myself. I can't go back to the home we shared, I can't face the idea of cleaning up his things, I have no plans, no future without him."
She began sobbing in earnest and I turned so that I was cradling her to my chest, her tears soaking my t-shirt. It occurred to me that from the outside we would look strange, two twenty something strangers locked in an embrace in a deserted cemetery, but in that moment it felt right. When Cassie had finally cried herself out she turned her face up to look at me.
"Cameron, I'm so"
"No," I interrupted her immediately, "you need to stop being sorry." I stared into her eyes for a moment, choosing my next words carefully. "Do you need a ride somewhere? It doesn't have to be home, I'll take you anywhere you want to go."
She stared at me for a long time, trying to read something in my face, and then she nodded. Without asking permission my hand reached up and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. Fast as lightening a thought flickered through my head, and without taking time to analyze I acted. I leaned down and kissed Cassie.
And she kissed me back.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
May 17th
Jamie stretched her arms above her head and yawned. The sun filtered through the gap in the curtains and illuminated a strip of her burgundy wall paper. She pushed over the jet black comforter and stepped gingerly onto the midnight carpet, carefully avoiding
*************************************************
the piles of books, CDs, and clothes. She knew her mother would cry if she saw the state of Jamie's room, but it's not like that was very likely. After all, the mother who is sleeping around with half of her coworkers doesn't really spend much time at home with her husband and two children. Jamie knocked over a few piles of things just for effect before opening the door to the bathroom she shared with her younger sister.
In sharp contrast to the dimness of Jamie's room, the bathroom was bright and full of light. The tub, toilet, and sink were powder blue and there were enough lights in this one room to light the entire two story house. Sammy was already in front of the mirror, dressed in an adorable pink bubble dress, hair perfectly curled, and makeup flawless. Jamie honestly wasn't sure what she could possibly be looking in the mirror for, she was already perfect. Sammy looked up at her as she came through the door.
"Only an hour before we have to be at school, Jamie. Don't you think you should put on something other than pajamas." Sammy said as she added a ribbon to her curls. Jamie glared at her.
"Out." Sammy made a face but quickly left the bathroom. Jamie jumped in the shower. When she got back to her room, feeling slightly more alive, she found Sammy sitting on her bed holding out a cup of coffee.
"You know that she's coming back right? Dad didn't mean it when he kicked her out last night. He still loves her." Sammy said as she handed over the cup. Jamie said nothing as she sipped and put on a pair of jeans and a ripped black tshirt.
"He may love her, but it's obvious that she doesn't love him. If he wants her back he's an idiot. You're an idiot too. We're all idiots for wanting someone in our lives who doesn't actually give a shit about us." Jamie kicked over a few more piles of books while Sammy pulled at invisible threads on her skirt.
"That's not true. She loves us. She's just not sure what she wants right now. She'll be back." Jamie turned to argue, but one look at Sammy's face changed her mind. She sat down on the bed and put her arm around her little sister.
"You're right, Sammy. I'm just being stupid because I'm sad. I know she'll come back. She loves you, and she would never leave you. Just give her some time." The lies felt sour in Jamie's mouth. She knew full and well that her mother wasn't coming back, she'd known for weeks. Yet, she couldn't bring herself to tell her sister the truth, Sammy was too loving to understand. "Now let's go eat some breakfast."
Dad was waiting for them downstairs with toast, eggs, and bacon already on the table. Jamie returned his tired smile and gave him a one armed hug as she poured herself a glass of orange juice. She waited until Sammy was engrossed in texting someone on her phone before pulling her dad into the kitchen.
"You have to tell Sammy she isn't coming back." Jamie whispered. "You can't let her hold on to false hope like this."
"She still might come back, she's come back before." Dad whispered back, and Jamie took a deep breath to calm herself. She turned away from her father and sat at the table across from Sammy. They ate in silence with Sammy glued to her phone making after school plans with her friends. Jamie waited until Sammy was finished with breakfast and sent her out to the car, saying she would join once the dishes were put away. As soon as the door closed behind her sister Jamie rounded on her father.
"What the hell is wrong with you?! Mom is cheating on you, she's sleeping with those men at her office. She left because she DOESN'T love you, and she's NOT coming back. I don't understand why you can't get that through your head. She won't be home tonight or tomorrow or the next day and eventually you and Sammy need to face that. It's better if you dealt with it sooner rather than later. She's a cheating bitch and you need to forget about her." Jamie's father just stared at her with his mouth hanging open, but Jamie didn't wait for him to come up with a response.
"Just throw out her stuff and tell Sammy it's over. Tonight." With those words Jamie grabbed her backpack and walked out the door.
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the piles of books, CDs, and clothes. She knew her mother would cry if she saw the state of Jamie's room, but it's not like that was very likely. After all, the mother who is sleeping around with half of her coworkers doesn't really spend much time at home with her husband and two children. Jamie knocked over a few piles of things just for effect before opening the door to the bathroom she shared with her younger sister.
In sharp contrast to the dimness of Jamie's room, the bathroom was bright and full of light. The tub, toilet, and sink were powder blue and there were enough lights in this one room to light the entire two story house. Sammy was already in front of the mirror, dressed in an adorable pink bubble dress, hair perfectly curled, and makeup flawless. Jamie honestly wasn't sure what she could possibly be looking in the mirror for, she was already perfect. Sammy looked up at her as she came through the door.
"Only an hour before we have to be at school, Jamie. Don't you think you should put on something other than pajamas." Sammy said as she added a ribbon to her curls. Jamie glared at her.
"Out." Sammy made a face but quickly left the bathroom. Jamie jumped in the shower. When she got back to her room, feeling slightly more alive, she found Sammy sitting on her bed holding out a cup of coffee.
"You know that she's coming back right? Dad didn't mean it when he kicked her out last night. He still loves her." Sammy said as she handed over the cup. Jamie said nothing as she sipped and put on a pair of jeans and a ripped black tshirt.
"He may love her, but it's obvious that she doesn't love him. If he wants her back he's an idiot. You're an idiot too. We're all idiots for wanting someone in our lives who doesn't actually give a shit about us." Jamie kicked over a few more piles of books while Sammy pulled at invisible threads on her skirt.
"That's not true. She loves us. She's just not sure what she wants right now. She'll be back." Jamie turned to argue, but one look at Sammy's face changed her mind. She sat down on the bed and put her arm around her little sister.
"You're right, Sammy. I'm just being stupid because I'm sad. I know she'll come back. She loves you, and she would never leave you. Just give her some time." The lies felt sour in Jamie's mouth. She knew full and well that her mother wasn't coming back, she'd known for weeks. Yet, she couldn't bring herself to tell her sister the truth, Sammy was too loving to understand. "Now let's go eat some breakfast."
Dad was waiting for them downstairs with toast, eggs, and bacon already on the table. Jamie returned his tired smile and gave him a one armed hug as she poured herself a glass of orange juice. She waited until Sammy was engrossed in texting someone on her phone before pulling her dad into the kitchen.
"You have to tell Sammy she isn't coming back." Jamie whispered. "You can't let her hold on to false hope like this."
"She still might come back, she's come back before." Dad whispered back, and Jamie took a deep breath to calm herself. She turned away from her father and sat at the table across from Sammy. They ate in silence with Sammy glued to her phone making after school plans with her friends. Jamie waited until Sammy was finished with breakfast and sent her out to the car, saying she would join once the dishes were put away. As soon as the door closed behind her sister Jamie rounded on her father.
"What the hell is wrong with you?! Mom is cheating on you, she's sleeping with those men at her office. She left because she DOESN'T love you, and she's NOT coming back. I don't understand why you can't get that through your head. She won't be home tonight or tomorrow or the next day and eventually you and Sammy need to face that. It's better if you dealt with it sooner rather than later. She's a cheating bitch and you need to forget about her." Jamie's father just stared at her with his mouth hanging open, but Jamie didn't wait for him to come up with a response.
"Just throw out her stuff and tell Sammy it's over. Tonight." With those words Jamie grabbed her backpack and walked out the door.
Thursday, May 10, 2012
May 10th
“I love you, Kris.”
Those were the last words I heard as a human. My world slowly slipped into darkness and when I awoke I wasn’t human any longer.
************************************
I know what you’re thinking; I spent my teen years reading vampire novels too. You’re expecting to hear that I was turned by my greatest love, but only because I was dying anyway. That when I awoke he held me as I survived the change and taught me that I could survive on animal blood or blood from blood banks or at the very least without actually injuring humans. Well, if that’s what you’re hoping for I recommend you stop reading now, my story is nothing like that.
Starting with the fact that the last words I heard as a human did NOT come from my true love, or my best friend, or a member of my family. It came from a slightly creepy boy who stalked me in high school and then turned out to be a vampire. His name was Dexter. Sometimes I wonder if I had just agreed to go to prom with him maybe graduation wouldn’t have ended with me drained of blood in a frat basement looking up into the face of a vampire.
I woke a week later in a house I didn’t recognize in a town hundreds of miles from anything I knew. Dexter wasn’t there, but he didn’t need to be. All it took was an accidental step in front of the window to make me realize that I was a prisoner until the sun went down. An Internet search revealed that I was reported missing, but they’d given up on the search. I was starving but there was literally nothing to eat in the house. In fact, aside from a computer on a desk with a chair, the bed I awoke in, and a couch and TV in the living room, the house was empty.
I scouted my surrounding from what I could glimpse through the windows (without getting into the sunlight myself), and I discovered my strength by breaking the leg off the computer chair, with one hand. I thought I had a decent plan for where to go and how to get home, but before the sun went down Dexter was back, and he wasn’t alone. Dexter brought a human with him, a boy he found when he was out. The boy was cute, I might have even given him a dance when I was human, but dancing wasn’t the plan that night. I’m not proud of what happened next, not just because I ripped the boys throat out with my teeth, but because I enjoyed it.
Before you start to judge me for killing an innocent boy, answer me this, have you ever been starving? I don’t mean hungry because you haven’t eaten in a few hours, I mean stomach completely empty, shooting pain in your belly, you’re going to die shortly without nourishment, starving. If you’ve never been that hungry than you can’t understand what I was going through. If you have been there than I’m pretty sure that you won’t fault me for eating the one thing that would bring me nutrition.
Dexter was there every step of the way, opening the boy’s vein and then egging me on and on until the boy’s neck more closely resembled pounded hamburger than human skin. By the end of it I was so high on the blood that I lost track of myself. The euphoria is so intoxicating that at that moment everything seemed like an amazing idea, even making out with the boy who took my life and turned me into a vampire. When the high wore off I would be disgusted with myself, but for those few hours I would do anything, and Dexter knew it.
He kept bringing in a steady stream of humans and like the drug addict that I was I took a shot of every last one. Eventually he’d show me how to leave them alive enough to survive, but in the beginning he only cared about giving me the high that he knew would make me love him. And the sick thing is that I did love him, deeply. In those blood soaked days he wasn’t the creeper who had murdered me, he was the savior who had opened my eyes to excitement and power, who had rescued me from a boring existence and filled my world with vibrant colors, amazing smells, and above all, love.
But Dexter’s fairy tale couldn’t last forever. Eventually the high wore off, I remembered who I was, what I’d done, and each day the resentment grew. When I wasn’t feeding I was brooding. Hating myself not just for the humans I’d fed on but also for the affection I’d shown the vampire who ruined my life. I was obsessing over my past life, what my friends were doing now, and what I’d lost. I was realizing that when I wasn’t drinking blood, when I was actually seeing things clearly, I didn’t want to be alive (or whatever qualifies as alive when you’re a vampire).
“I hate you, Dexter.”
Those were the last words I ever spoke. I uttered them as I used blood given strength to throw Dexter out of my way and step out of the front door into the bright noon sun.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
May 3rd
This marks the first day of finish a story or expand on a dream. Today I'm finishing (or at least continuing) a story. The old part will come before the line of **** and the new part after, this is a pattern I'll stick to every week.
"It's really cold here," Jez said. "Why did we have to come?"
**************************************************************************************************
"Because," David reminded her, "this is the last place anyone saw them."
"So you keep saying," Annabelle interrupted, "but who saw them anyway? And more importantly, why do we care? Last time I checked none of us cared about Sammy or Kyle. They're stuck up jerks who've never been nice to anyone a day in their lives." Jez and David nodded their agreement but Melody stepped forward.
"You know very well who saw them last, Belle. And even if you didn't, you know exactly why we care, or do I need to remind you what happened?" Melody glared at each member in the group until they turned their faces away. That was better, she didn't want to have to talk about the incident again, not if it could be avoided. "Now that that's settled, it's time to get to work. David, did you bring the supplies?"
David nodded and swung the large hiking backpack off his shoulder. He handed out flashlights, flares, compasses, energy bars and maps. David pointed to the tiny colored dots on his map. "Each one is enchanted, so we can see where each other map is anytime. Hopefully we can coordinate that way." The others nodded and turned to Melody, it was clear that she was the leader of this quest.
"Sammy and Kyle have been missing for two days, and in case you hadn't noticed, it's awful cold out here. The last place anyone saw them was parked up here at the kissing rock." Melody pointed to the large hollow rock, that was a popular make out spot. "We're going to spread out from the rock and work our way around the area. The police have already done a search, but they don't know what we know. You know what to look for. Send the signal if you find anything." She indicted her flare and then nodded at the group.
Almost as one the four of them stepped up to the kissing rock and began walking out like the spokes of a bicycle wheel. No one spoke, as they were each searching intently and lost in their own thoughts. The continued to move out into the woods, searching the surrounding area as they went. Soon they drifted far enough apart that they could no longer see each other through the trees.
Melody shivered in her jacket, wishing she'd brought her heavy winter coat. *They could be anything,* she thought, *any sort of small creature. I hope they stuck together, that's our only hope of finding them.* For what seemed like the thousandth time in the last two days she cursed herself for picking up that necklace and she cursed Kyle for cheating on her and then running off with Sammy and she cursed her mother for the power flowing in her veins that made this all possible in the first place. She stopped herself just short of reliving those ten minutes again, that wouldn't do anything but get her upset again, and it certainly wouldn't help in the search. She trained her eyes back on the underbrush and started searching so intently that the flare was almost back below the treeline before she noticed it. A quick glance at the map told her Jez had sent the signal.
Jez stood in a small clearing looking at the two squirrels, this had to be them. No wild animal would lay in the open like this, and not move when she came near, and be holding hands, which is certainly what the squirrels appeared to be doing. Despite her dislike of the Kyle and Sammy, she felt relief flood her system when she saw the pair of rodents. After all, like it or not, this was her fault. If only she hadn't agreed to Melody's plan, they couldn't have done it without all of them. Of course, at the time she'd been filled with anger on Melody's behalf, they all had been.
Melody is the last to reach the clearing, and one look at the squirrels is enough to tell her they've found what they were looking for. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the locket, opened it, and stared at the pictures of Sammy and Kyle. She looked to the others for assistance, and David motioned that she should break the locket. With one last glance at the squirrels she snapped the locket in half.
While the group watched, the squirrels slowly began to morph and grow until Sammy and Kyle stood before the group, naked. Annabelle was prepared for this eventuality and quickly had them wrapped in blankets. Kyle and Sammy just stared at the four people surrounding them like they didn't know what to think. Annabelle couldn't blame them, arriving here to make out and then becoming a squirrel for two days could probably do a number on anyone. Still, she didn't feel too sorry for them, it's not like they were innocent in this whole affair.
"What happened?" Kyle asked, looking from face to face. Melody stepped forward, ready to apologize, explain it all, beg for forgiveness, but Jez stepped up first.
"You just learned not to cheat on a witch, bastard." Jez spat and then grabbing Annabelle and Melody by the arms she turned and walked away. David followed behind leaving the blanketed couple in the clearing, staring open mouthed and disbelieving.
"It's really cold here," Jez said. "Why did we have to come?"
**************************************************************************************************
"Because," David reminded her, "this is the last place anyone saw them."
"So you keep saying," Annabelle interrupted, "but who saw them anyway? And more importantly, why do we care? Last time I checked none of us cared about Sammy or Kyle. They're stuck up jerks who've never been nice to anyone a day in their lives." Jez and David nodded their agreement but Melody stepped forward.
"You know very well who saw them last, Belle. And even if you didn't, you know exactly why we care, or do I need to remind you what happened?" Melody glared at each member in the group until they turned their faces away. That was better, she didn't want to have to talk about the incident again, not if it could be avoided. "Now that that's settled, it's time to get to work. David, did you bring the supplies?"
David nodded and swung the large hiking backpack off his shoulder. He handed out flashlights, flares, compasses, energy bars and maps. David pointed to the tiny colored dots on his map. "Each one is enchanted, so we can see where each other map is anytime. Hopefully we can coordinate that way." The others nodded and turned to Melody, it was clear that she was the leader of this quest.
"Sammy and Kyle have been missing for two days, and in case you hadn't noticed, it's awful cold out here. The last place anyone saw them was parked up here at the kissing rock." Melody pointed to the large hollow rock, that was a popular make out spot. "We're going to spread out from the rock and work our way around the area. The police have already done a search, but they don't know what we know. You know what to look for. Send the signal if you find anything." She indicted her flare and then nodded at the group.
Almost as one the four of them stepped up to the kissing rock and began walking out like the spokes of a bicycle wheel. No one spoke, as they were each searching intently and lost in their own thoughts. The continued to move out into the woods, searching the surrounding area as they went. Soon they drifted far enough apart that they could no longer see each other through the trees.
Melody shivered in her jacket, wishing she'd brought her heavy winter coat. *They could be anything,* she thought, *any sort of small creature. I hope they stuck together, that's our only hope of finding them.* For what seemed like the thousandth time in the last two days she cursed herself for picking up that necklace and she cursed Kyle for cheating on her and then running off with Sammy and she cursed her mother for the power flowing in her veins that made this all possible in the first place. She stopped herself just short of reliving those ten minutes again, that wouldn't do anything but get her upset again, and it certainly wouldn't help in the search. She trained her eyes back on the underbrush and started searching so intently that the flare was almost back below the treeline before she noticed it. A quick glance at the map told her Jez had sent the signal.
Jez stood in a small clearing looking at the two squirrels, this had to be them. No wild animal would lay in the open like this, and not move when she came near, and be holding hands, which is certainly what the squirrels appeared to be doing. Despite her dislike of the Kyle and Sammy, she felt relief flood her system when she saw the pair of rodents. After all, like it or not, this was her fault. If only she hadn't agreed to Melody's plan, they couldn't have done it without all of them. Of course, at the time she'd been filled with anger on Melody's behalf, they all had been.
Melody is the last to reach the clearing, and one look at the squirrels is enough to tell her they've found what they were looking for. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the locket, opened it, and stared at the pictures of Sammy and Kyle. She looked to the others for assistance, and David motioned that she should break the locket. With one last glance at the squirrels she snapped the locket in half.
While the group watched, the squirrels slowly began to morph and grow until Sammy and Kyle stood before the group, naked. Annabelle was prepared for this eventuality and quickly had them wrapped in blankets. Kyle and Sammy just stared at the four people surrounding them like they didn't know what to think. Annabelle couldn't blame them, arriving here to make out and then becoming a squirrel for two days could probably do a number on anyone. Still, she didn't feel too sorry for them, it's not like they were innocent in this whole affair.
"What happened?" Kyle asked, looking from face to face. Melody stepped forward, ready to apologize, explain it all, beg for forgiveness, but Jez stepped up first.
"You just learned not to cheat on a witch, bastard." Jez spat and then grabbing Annabelle and Melody by the arms she turned and walked away. David followed behind leaving the blanketed couple in the clearing, staring open mouthed and disbelieving.
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